How the Wilfried Bony to Newcastle United story started

NUFC Blog's latest blog on metro.co.uk is out now!

NUFC Blog’s latest piece on metro.co.uk is out now!

This is a fairly brief note to let you all know that my latest blog for Metro.co.uk is now published.

Entitled “How the Wilfried Bony to Newcastle United story started,” it takes a look at how a piece on this site extolling the virtues of Vitesse Arnhem’s prodigious striker eventually led (via the Telegraph) to a full blown Newcastle United transfer rumour which even incurred the wrath of Derek Llambias according to the Journal (which made my day incidentally).

It is not a rare occurence by any means, with so called journalists from virtually all the major media organs constantly taking their inspiration for specious transfer stories from the most unlikely sources, then trying to give them a veneer of respectabilty by using stock phrases such as “sources close to the club,” “it is understood that…” or whatever.

Hope you like it.

How the Wilfried Bony to Newcastle United story started.

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avatar NUFCBlog Author: workyticket workyticket has written 1035 articles on this blog.

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149 Responses to “How the Wilfried Bony to Newcastle United story started”

  1. 1
    avatar sammy d says:

    This explains your response to post 1 yesterday worky you cheeky monkey.

  2. 2
    avatar sammy d says:

    just red the metro article, some good points, most of all we should sign bony he is a beast.

  3. 3
    avatar Steven GJ says:

    ‘In Carr we trust’

    Im not suggesting you dont know a good player when you see one but I’m guessing if Ncl havent looked at signing him then it means ‘Messiah’ Carr doesnt think he is upto the EPL.

    Good article I never believe anything I read from the press as there are so many examples of them stealing ideas from internet

  4. 4
    avatar BLYTH MAG says:

    Worky,i set my account up on my mobile under Jack72.when i tried logging in on laptop i had to make new account.like i said,it maybe because it was set up on my googlemail email,instead of my normal email i always use.

  5. 5
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: so if I say Lee Ryder is an idiot he may be reading? Actually, I don’t think he is an idiot because his live e-mail chats are quite informative. I think he is a paid lacky of NUFC and writes in the style of Oliver and Gibson in the most UNinformative articles. If you laid the column inches of drivel from those three end to end I have been told by a reliable source that it would stretch to the moon and back.

  6. 6
    avatar GS says:

    Does Carr go to Holland? Even Cisse who was in the German League started out at Metz.

  7. 7
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 10:28 am

    Does Carr go to Holland? Even Cisse who was in the German League started out at Metz.

    GS, remember little Vurn from Ajax? He does the Eurostar beat. That’s London, Calais, Lille, Paris, Brussels, Antwerp, Rotterdam, the Hague, Schiphol (Amsterdam’s airport), Amsterdam (see map below). He’s claimed that he’s had a sniff around Germany too.

    http://www.londonbrusselstrain.com/images/eurostar-route.jpg

  8. 8
    avatar workyticket says:

    BLYTH MAG says:
    March 27, 2013 at 2:00 am

    “Worky,i set my account up on my mobile under Jack72.when i tried logging in on laptop i had to make new account.like i said,it maybe because it was set up on my googlemail email,instead of my normal email i always use.”

    Jack / Blyth have you got your password right on your Laptop? If you’re not sure, try this link:

    http://www.nufcblog.org/wp-login.php?action=lostpassword

  9. 9
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: I forgot about Little Vurn. My brother lives in Arnhem, I’ll ask him about Bony.

  10. 10
    avatar GS says:

    Well, it looks like Chuck has took the huff for good. Worky, what is it about your site that makes long time contributors take their toys and go home? It is just so damn childish.

  11. 11
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    “the wrath of dekka”, sounds like a new star wars film.
    i dont know how they would say, he isn’t up to the rigours of prem football.
    i’ve only seen little bits and bobs of him, but he is defo worth the punt, at the right price.
    it just shows how someone can express an opinion, on a particular player, and even the laziest of hacks, will jump on it.

    whenever i hear the name wifried bony, it conjures up images of sean bean saying, “he’s a bugger pat, that sir wilfried bony”.

  12. 12
    avatar GS says:

    Will Bonney is Billy the Kid.

  13. 13
    avatar workyticket says:

    joe hawkins says:
    March 27, 2013 at 12:42 pm (Edit)

    “the wrath of dekka”, sounds like a new star wars film.”

    Star Trek II – The Wrath of Khan, Joe.

    If I were Llambias (perish the thought), I would roll with it. I’d give all interviews in a big armchair stroking a white Persian cat and say things like “I’ve been expecting you Mr.Ryder.” I would also build a tank full of sharks at SJP instead of a new bar.

  14. 14
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 12:33 pm

    “Well, it looks like Chuck has took the huff for good. Worky.”

    Is he still behaving himself on the other blog, GS?

  15. 15
    avatar GS says:

    What, Yohan? The poor little lad didn’t get his winter break and gets depressed. He is a very good player but this smacks of pampered ars*hole. I think he is confusing depression with “feeling slightly sad”.

    http://www.givemefootball.com/336964-newcastle-uniteds-yohan-cabaye-reveals-depression-battle

  16. 16
    avatar GS says:

    Worky @14: I haven’t looked. I stay away for the most part because that Troy idiot irritates me.

  17. 17
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 1:03 pm

    “Worky @14: I haven’t looked. I stay away for the most part because that Troy idiot irritates me.”

    GS, do you mean .com or .cock?

  18. 18
    avatar GS says:

    .cock. I read Ed’s rehashes now and again. I can only get through about 5 of the replies before becoming disinterested. The match day stuff is quite funny though. They swing from happy to sad like a cross between Marvin the Robot, Yohan Cabaye and Physix.

    Also, Ed has on his banner a picture of Pardew looking all strong and noble like. That always makes me laugh.

  19. 19
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, Chuck on .cock? You’re kidding surely? I thought he’d gone back to Ed’s site.

  20. 20
    avatar GS says:

    Not kidding Work(e)y. He was being very nice as well. Not his normal confrontational self. That was more than a week ago so there have probably been a few Rogers (sic), “new young managers” and “why doesn’t everybody love me” rants since then.

  21. 21
    avatar GS says:

    It is quite informative that a man can be so stubborn as to continue to call Rodgers “Rogers” even when he knows the correct spelling :) . It is like the spelling of a name is an opinion and he is sticking to it, even when it is wrong.

  22. 22
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, when I was getting alot of hate mail from Toonsy’s acolytes, they used to mention Chuck constantly too. Some of the things they wrote about him, and what they wanted to do to him were absolutely vile.

  23. 23
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: one of my pet hates is the phrase “man love” so don’t accuse me again of that :)

    I looked up the word sophistry and it had a picture of Chuck.

  24. 24
    avatar GS says:

    His picture also appeared next to “misanthrope” in my dictionary.

  25. 25
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 2:36 pm

    “Worky: one of my pet hates is the phrase “man love” so don’t accuse me again of that”

    GS, I don’t know what you mean as I have NEVER used the phrase “man love,” not ever. You must be thinking of someone else there.

    Sophistrry generally has the same meaning as a word I do use fairly often, “specious,” ie something that sounds fairly plausible on the surface but is actually utter bollocks. Chuck’s arguments aren’t even fairly plausible on the surface.

  26. 26
    avatar GS says:

    :) :) ;) just to annoy him if he is reading :)

  27. 27
    avatar GS says:

    Worky man, I think you said I had a crush on Chuckles which amounts to the same thing as man lurv.

  28. 28
    avatar GS says:

    It could be my pathetic (non) sense of humour but the funniest thing anybody ever said on here was “who the f@ck cares if you are going to get an Amstel”.

  29. 29
    avatar workyticket says:

    You do mention him alot, GS.

  30. 30
    avatar GS says:

    Last thing on Chuckerihno. Reading him was like watching Scooby Doo, same episode over and over again.

  31. 31
    avatar GS says:

    So that wasn’t the last thing. I liked to rile him up and he was probably the person who was on here the most.

  32. 32
    avatar GS says:

    There was some weird post earlier where you mentioned you were a non-member of MENSA. I did one of those online IQ tests when I was drunk. My IQ dropped by 10 points from when I did the same test when I was sober – from 85 to 75.

    I also saw something where they said the average IQ had gone up. I don’t understand it though as shouldn’t the average still be 100. It is not really a test, it is a statistical measure?

  33. 33
    avatar GS says:

    And what is all this about the gays wanting to get married? I can tell Yohan Cabaye a thing or two about being depressed, I didn’t have a f@cking winter break from my wife.

  34. 34
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 3:11 pm

    “There was some weird post earlier where you mentioned you were a non-member of MENSA. I did one of those online IQ tests when I was drunk. My IQ dropped by 10 points from when I did the same test when I was sober – from 85 to 75.”

    GS, if your IQ was between 85 and 75 you’d wouldn’t be on here all the time, you’d be on .com or .cock. Average IQ is 100ish and I seem to recall that you required an IQ of 140 or over to be a member of Mensa. I think they say that you have to be in the top 2% now but that might be the same thing. 75-85 is getting towards batty level. You’ve made a mistake somewhere as there is no way your IQ is that low. Can you tell the time? Can you tie your own shoelaces? :-)

  35. 35
    avatar GS says:

    batty level? How dare you. He is in the lower fifth quartile of four.

  36. 36
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: my ex-wife had me do the online IQ thing. I think she wanted to know if she was smarter than me. Turns out by that test she wasn’t, she was pretty though and that is all that matters about women.

  37. 37
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 3:50 pm

    “I think she wanted to know if she was smarter than me. Turns out by that test she wasn’t”

    Well if she couldn’t beat 75-85, you must’ve been married to Sarah Palin.

  38. 38
    avatar GS says:

    The average should still be 100. Bell curve, long tails, the Troy and Batty moron factor should not affect the mid-point / average. Isn’t that the whole point of long tails that the mid-point stays at 100?

  39. 39
    avatar GS says:

    I think my IQ has gone down to 75 from being on here. That’s another 10 points due to you Chuckster :)

    Anyway, football? We have none, Montenegro and England :)

  40. 40
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 4:35 pm

    “I think my IQ has gone down to 75 from being on here.”

    GS, your IQ is not 75, it’s over 100. If it was 75, you wouldn’t be telling people what to do with their money on the other side of the pond, you’d be picking up litter on Tyneside. That wasn’t a proper IQ test.

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 4:35 pm

    “Anyway, football? We have none, Montenegro and England”

    I’ve been studying the history of Benfica, GS. Unsurprisingly to us, the period when Graeme Souness was head coach there is referred to as “the dark years.” :-)

  41. 41
    avatar GS says:

    Really, Worky :) The main point was that my IQ only dropped by 10 when I was drunk. I was surprised. The starting point was a bit higher -95

    IQ ower 100? I’ll be lucky.

  42. 42
    avatar GS says:

    So I saw Neville Neville got into trouble. Thank Jesus, Jesus that me Mam didn’t decide to call me Stuart Stewart. That would have been fun!

  43. 43
    avatar GS says:

    Work(e)y. I can’t jinx the f2cking match by saying we will lose to Benfica on your poll. I have to not vote.

  44. 44
    avatar workyticket says:

    Either that or you were as pissed as a fart GS. I’m sure they don’t do proper, accredited (or whatever the right word is) IQ tests online. Mine were like exams with a time limit and an invigilator and all that.

  45. 45
    avatar GS says:

    “invigilator”? mine were too. That’s why I scored 25 on the real test. So now you are bragging???

  46. 46
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 5:37 pm

    “Work(e)y. I can’t jinx the f2cking match by saying we will lose to Benfica on your poll. I have to not vote.”

    Benfica, along with Ajax and Barcelona have one of the best academies in the world. The thing is though that Benfica and Ajax have to sell most of their best players eventually because they don’t have the telly money. Barcelona don’t.

  47. 47
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 5:45 pm

    “So now you are bragging???”

    If I revealed my IQ, that would be bragging GS. ;-)

  48. 48
    avatar GS says:

    pissed as a fart or pissed as a newt. Those sayings don’t make any sense whether you have an IQ of 160 like you or 220 like me (which doesn’t even exist, but I will claim it anyway).

  49. 49
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 5:48 pm

    “220 like me (which doesn’t even exist, but I will claim it anyway).”

    They say that the great liberal thinker, John Stuart Mill, would have been nudging that sort of level if they had IQ tests back in his day. He could speak ancient Greek when he was three. He also had one of the world’s largest brains, though that wasn’t necessarily related.

  50. 50
    avatar GS says:

    Alreet then. Was Wundelich? As I said, I did it because me wife thought she were clever. That’s the one where my IQ went down by 10 when I was drunk online. And I know that 65 IQ is Chuck level.

  51. 51
    avatar Simple-Tings says:

    Good and funny readinh worky. An African Shearer with dreads lol. Cracked me up.

  52. 52
    avatar GS says:

    John Stuart Mill, of his free will drank some cider and got particularly ill?

  53. 53
    avatar workyticket says:

    Simple-Tings says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:00 pm

    “Good and funny readinh worky. An African Shearer with dreads lol. Cracked me up.”

    Cheers ST. They edited out the word “gadgie” and replaced it with “boy” in that section though, which some of our more PC friends might think is a tad racist when referring to a fully grown black footballer. The proofreader was obviously a Geordieist AND a racist! :-)

  54. 54
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:03 pm

    “John Stuart Mill, of his free will”

    You see? John Stuart Mill and his free will would be totally meaningless to someone with an IQ of 75. ;-)

  55. 55
    avatar GS says:

    Have you read that JS Mill stuff Worky? I find JK Rowling better. Existentialism? Harry Potter?

    I read, like, “the history of western philosophy” by Bertrand Russell and it made a lot more sense than Hairy Pottersby.

  56. 56
    avatar GS says:

    anybody that brags about their brains shouldn’t brag about their brains because it is gauche.

  57. 57
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:20 pm

    “Have you read that JS Mill stuff Worky? I find JK Rowling better. Existentialism? Harry Potter?”

    Yup, but I’m more of a Thomas Paine man.

    Yes I’ve read the existentialists but not JK Rowling, Dan Brown or any of that kind of f*cking drivel. You might ask how I know it’s f*cking drivel if I haven’t read it, but I just do.

  58. 58
    avatar BLYTH MAG says:

    Wey hopefully thats the mackems up shit creak even more.top scorer Fletcher and Jimmy Saville’s son Cattermole both out for the season.hope to god we put the final nail in there coffin so they get relegated.if so,those of you who are unlucky enough to work with any mackems will not get any backchat for a long long time.

  59. 59
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:20 pm

    “I read, like, “the history of western philosophy” by Bertrand Russell”

    GS, have you ever read anything by his mate, Wittgenstein? That will bend your brain out of shape no matter what your IQ is.

    I was re-reading Chomsky on supporting sports teams the other day. I’m not sure if his thoughts on that subject would go down too well on a blog like this though. :-)

  60. 60
    avatar GS says:

    Thomas Paine. The French, English, American git. I didn’t read Harry Potter either.

  61. 61
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: I never quite got the Russell pacifist stuff. If it is Hitler or Stalin, you have to stand up for yourself.

  62. 62
    avatar workyticket says:

    BLYTH MAG says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:30 pm

    “and Jimmy Saville’s son Cattermole”

    Jack, Like most Geordies, I was laughing about this, but some worthless Wearside Tramp has made a badly Photoshopped fake of him in a Toon shirt now.

    How pathetic can they get?

  63. 63
    avatar GS says:

    Didn’t Wiittgenstein have a good haircut though?

  64. 64
    avatar GS says:

    F*ckin’ Mackems, send them doon.

  65. 65
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:43 pm

    “Worky: I never quite got the Russell pacifist stuff. If it is Hitler or Stalin, you have to stand up for yourself.”

    GS, Bertrand Russell was never a complete pacifist, and he agreed with your point about Stalin and Hitler. He was an activist against Britain’s participation in the First World War (for which he was imprisoned), NOT the the second one.

  66. 66
    avatar BLYTH MAG says:

    Worky i got sent a one with him in a mackem top months ago..typical mackems never 1st with ideas.

  67. 67
    avatar workyticket says:

    BLYTH MAG says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:56 pm

    “Worky i got sent a one with him in a mackem top months ago..typical mackems never 1st with ideas.”

    Jack, the one of him in a Mackem top was real.

    Did you see my other comment about your registration problems?

  68. 68
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 6:45 pm

    “Didn’t Wiittgenstein have a good haircut though?”

    He just had that good, strong hair like Samuel Beckett and my Grandad, the kind that makes you look very manly and never falls out.

    Wittgenstein’s message to Toon fans:

    “Nothing is so difficult as NOT deceiving oneself.”

  69. 69
    avatar GS says:

    Worky @64: thanks for that. You tell me stuff I don’t know now and again. Seriously. I knew he was in prison I didn’t know he changed his mind.

    I also read “Why I am not a Christian” by him. That might make you think that the IQ discussion before wasn’t real?

  70. 70
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 7:13 pm

    “Seriously. I knew he was in prison I didn’t know he changed his mind.”

    GS, he still objected to the First World War so he didn’t “change his mind” there. Where he changed his mind was at the beginning of the Second World War when attempts at appeasement were exhausted and A.H. started his European tour in earnest. From that point he was of the mind that Hitler had to be defeated and that regrettably, war was a lesser evil than the alternative.

  71. 71
    avatar BLYTH MAG says:

    aye Worky i read it mate.is there anyway you can tell me which email address i used for my other account tho?

  72. 72
    avatar GS says:

    OK we won’t argue. He went from full on pacifist to NOT pacifist? You are probably right as you know more about this than I do. At least he wasn’t an appeaser, Neville. He could have been Neville Neville as well :)

  73. 73
    avatar chuck says:

    Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events,
    weak minds discuss people !

    When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the looser !

    The way to a good reputation is to endevor to be what you desire to be !

  74. 74
    avatar GS says:

    “looser” ha.

  75. 75
    avatar GS says:

    endevor, ha.

  76. 76
    avatar GS says:

    Your back Chuck? Or even, you’re back Chuck?

  77. 77
    avatar workyticket says:

    BLYTH MAG says:
    March 27, 2013 at 8:02 pm

    “aye Worky i read it mate.is there anyway you can tell me which email address i used for my other account tho?”

    Jack, I’ve just checked the database for you. There is no “Jack72″ (and I made sure I got it right). However there IS a “BLYTH MAG”

    Did you just put “Jack72″ in a comment one day, let your browser save it so you didn’t have to type it in every time, then forget that you never actually registered that usernme? ;-)

    I shouldn’t put your email on here as it is as it could be picked up by spam bots and circualted two spammers. However, it is the same for both “Jack72″ and “BLYTH MAG” in you comments (l.warnes at hotmail.com).

    Right! There are two things you can do. You can either:

    Go to you “BLYTH MAG” membership page, scroll down to “Nickname (Required)” and change “BLYTH MAG” to “Jack72″ if that is what you want. Then you need to scroll right down to the bottom and click on the blue “Update Profile” button.

    Then, you go to the “Display name publicly as” menu, click on the arrow and select “Jack 72″ from the list and update profile as you did before.

    The other alternative is to set up a “Jack72″ registration from scratch, however if you keep the “BLYTH MAG” identity too, you will not be able to use the same e.mail address in the registration.

    It’s up to you.

    Let me know how you get on and if you need any further help.

  78. 78
    avatar GS says:

    Chucky: I enjoy what you write, so don’t get too wound up by what I say to you.

  79. 79
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 8:04 pm

    “OK we won’t argue. He went from full on pacifist to NOT pacifist?”

    No, as I’ve already mentioned, he thought that ALL wars were evil, however he accepted that a few of them were necessary evils to prevent an even greater evil. He belived that roughly, there were four kinds of war:

    1, Wars of Colonisation,
    2. Wars of Principle,
    3. Wars of Self-defence;
    4. Wars of Prestige.

    Of those he thought that those of the first two kinds were “fairly often justified,” the third “seldom, except against an adversary of inferior civilization” and the fourth, “never.”

    Hence, he wasn’t a “pacifist,” and he can take his views on wars of colonisation and shove ‘em up his colon as far as I’m concerned.

  80. 80
    avatar GS says:

    Yeah, colonialism equals mercantialism. Both equally bad.

  81. 81
    avatar GS says:

    And then “ha” again. you are a moron Chucky babe. I knew you were reading and not writing :)

  82. 82
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 9:17 pm

    “Yeah, colonialism equals mercantialism. Both equally bad.”

    He justified it on the grounds of advancement of civilisation, citing the United States as an example. But when I look at the United States, I can’t thinking that he could have picked a better example than that! :-)

  83. 83
    avatar GS says:

    Are we getting back to Thomas Paine now Worky?

  84. 84
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 9:25 pm

    “Are we getting back to Thomas Paine now Worky?”

    I was still writing about Bertie Russell GS.

  85. 85
    avatar GS says:

    You know Worky. I live in the United States of America and it is not that bad. Chicago, New York, LA are great cities.

    The North side of Chicago is an amazing place to live. South side, you get shot! There’s also nothing around here for 200 miles. Flat and boring, like my ex-wife. No Missus, leave that alone :)

  86. 86
    avatar workyticket says:

    chuck says:
    March 27, 2013 at 8:28 pm

    “Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events,
    weak minds discuss people !

    When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the looser !

    The way to a good reputation is to endevor to be what you desire to be !”

    Well we’re trying to discuss the ideas of Bertie Russell, Chuck, and you’re trying to take sideswipes at users on here again. Do you really have no sense of irony whatsoever?

  87. 87
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: I saw in a paper the other day that PG Wodehouse was a bit Nazi, it didn’t make any sense at all as all it said was he lived in France during the occupation.

    Eggs, beans and crumpets.

  88. 88
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: I knew Chuckster still read your blog :)

  89. 89
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 9:34 pm

    “You know Worky. I live in the United States of America and it is not that bad. Chicago, New York, LA are great cities.”

    When I think of Chicago (not often) I still tend to think of ‘twenties guys in hats getting out of ‘twenties Cadillacs and blowing each other away with Thomson machine guns.

    Who decides which civilisation is superior to another anyway GS? And what about Sarah Palin?

  90. 90
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: I watched “Game of Thrones” the other night. That wasn’t an evil war because it was made up.

  91. 91
    avatar GS says:

    Sarah Palin? A moron with an attitude. You should watch the HBO movie about her.

    As I said, NY, LA Chicago.

    But, you live in London with the Russians and the Sheiks now.

  92. 92
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 9:39 pm

    “Worky: I saw in a paper the other day that PG Wodehouse was a bit Nazi, it didn’t make any sense at all as all it said was he lived in France during the occupation.”

    He lived in Le Touquet when the Germans overran France so they took him and interred him in Berlin for the war, where he went on working.

    Have you ever read Wodehouse’s character “Roderick Spode” and his “Black Shorts” :lol:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roderick_Spode

  93. 93
    avatar GS says:

    We’ll have to get on that IQ comparison again. You are good at spelling and French and NUFC stuff. I am pretty good at being below average.

  94. 94
    avatar GS says:

    I read “eggs, beans and crumpets”, Summer something and about 6 others. The best plane reading ever.

  95. 95
    avatar GS says:

    Worky, I have to go out and get some Amstels. Have you ever read any Tom Sharpe? Inglorious Mayhem.

  96. 96
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 10:06 pm

    “I read “eggs, beans and crumpets”, Summer something and about 6 others. The best plane reading ever.”

    Did you ever watch the Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie version of Jeeves and Wooster over there? If you haven’t, you should treat yourself.

  97. 97
    avatar GS says:

    They had it here. I tried to convince people to watch Father Ted as well. Tw@ts, or Chuck’s friends.

  98. 98
    avatar GS says:

    the 1st Saffa one was so funny I was almost cr@pping myself laughing at it.

  99. 99
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 27, 2013 at 10:10 pm

    “Worky, I have to go out and get some Amstels. Have you ever read any Tom Sharpe? Inglorious Mayhem.”

    No, I haven’t read that. I saw TV adaptations of Sharpe’s “Porterhouse Blue” and “Blott on the Landscape” many years back. When I used to read novels it was usually stuff like Dostoyevsky, Flaubert, Camus, Orwell, Henry Miller, Thomas Mann…

  100. 100
    avatar GS says:

    I read a few novels like that. Tin Drum was one. I got through 600 of 700 hundred pages. Gunter Grass, you are a c@nt.

    Porterhouse Blue isn’t very good. Indecent Exposure is the funniest thing you will ever read in your life.

  101. 101
    avatar workyticket says:

    I never read “Tin Drum” GS. It doesn’t sound like you’ve read any Henry Miller if you comparing it with that. They were sleazy, degenerate, absolutely filthy romps without any dull moments whatsoever, only written by a brilliant writer. Go out and get “Tropic of Cancer.”

  102. 102
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, you do realise that you are ruining this blog? ;-)

    I was supposed to be finishing an epic piece and posting it today but it’s too late now because I’ve been at it with you for most of my blog time. I am knacked now and can’t bear the thought of staring at a screen and finishing what I started. I was also supposed to be writing to Hugh and several other people too.

    I haven’t even had my dinner.

  103. 103
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, I went off to watch the telly and “Wodehouse in exile” is on. That’s good timing, bearing in mind what we were discussing earlier.

  104. 104
    avatar chuck says:

    Wittgenstein?
    How can you talk about Wittgenstein without mentioning Thomas Aquinas ?
    The same with John Stuart Mill, without mentioning Socratese ?
    As for the corset maker from east anglia, he talked more common sense than all of them.
    I dont really know where Bertie Russell fits.
    Actually i enjoyed Eveln Waughs, Black Mischief if taken in it’s time and not seriously, as more entertaining and (in it’s own small way)a lesson in the ridiculess.

  105. 105
    avatar chuck says:

    As it turns out Gunter der Wonter, was a member of the Waffen SS.
    Who knew ?

  106. 106
    avatar workyticket says:

    Alot of people were in the SS Chuck and they weren’t all German either, but they didn’t talk about it very much for some reason.

    GS brought up Bertrand Russell as he read his “A History of Western Philosophy” once, and wanted to discuss his position on pacifism.

  107. 107
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    billy connolly summed up sarah palin to a tee, during the last election, “it’s scary to think, that a woman who thinks the world is only 6 thousand years old, could soon be running it”.

  108. 108
    avatar Belfast Toon says:

    Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
    who was very rarely stable.

    Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
    who could think you under the table.

    David Hume could out-consume
    Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel.

    And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
    who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

    There’s nothing Nietzsche couldn’t teach ya
    ’bout the raising of the wrist,
    Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

    John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
    On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

    Plato, they say, could stick it away,
    Half a crate of whiskey every day.

    Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
    And Hobbes was fond of his dram.

    And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart,
    “I drink, therefore I am.”

    Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed,
    A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he’s pissed.

  109. 109
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    belfast toon, nice one! lol

  110. 110
    avatar Belfast Toon says:

    joe hawkins says:

    belfast toon, nice one! lol

    I’m afraid i was baffled by Worky, GS et al knowledge of the philosophers. But i did remember the old Python sketch. A bunch of lecturers called “Bruce” from the Philosophy Department of the University of Woolloomooloo.

  111. 111
    avatar workyticket says:

    No Shopenhauer in there Belfast, not to mention one of my own personal favourites, Hairyclitoris of Ephesus.

  112. 112
  113. 113
    avatar Belfast toon says:

    I’ve been in Ephesus Worky, but never had the pleasure! (Not in Ephesus, anyway!)

  114. 114
    avatar workyticket says:

    Well there’s certainly no shortage of hairy clitorises in Turkey, Belfast.

  115. 115
    avatar GS says:

    Worky @102: there is no football. I don’t count England games as football.

    Apparently, we have an injury crisis because Tiote got a knock. I don’t understand it as we have Vurn and Perch as cover.

    Are we getting the excuses in early? I think we have a good chance at Citeh.

  116. 116
    avatar GS says:

    Worky @114: I don’t know what girls you have been with but they couldn’t have been up to much if the had hairy clitorises.

  117. 117
    avatar workyticket says:

    Enough of that kind of thing GS.

    What do you think of Llambias’s latest pronouncements on the club’s finances? They’re not releasing the fuller accounts from Companies House for a few days yet.

  118. 118
    avatar chuck says:

    I doubt if you will find much pubic hair in Ephesus, as most muslim women remove it for hygienic reasons.
    Tell me how much you have traveled and i will tell you how much you know!

  119. 119
    avatar GS says:

    The accounts really don’t mean that much to anybody except Ashley, right? He is 100% owner, he can do what he wants.

    We all know he is getting free advertising for Sprots Direct, but so what! He is pumping up the market value of Sprots Direct which will only make him richer. He is not dumb. I think he realises that we will never compete with Barcelona and Man U unless we find someone like Brian Clough. And then he appoints Alan Pardew, oh.

    You never know, the rumours of 3 “purples” in the summer may be true. Ashley blows hot and cold at Newcastle. He has done a few things that were cheered by the fans at the time like appointing Shearer and Keegan and getting rid of Allardyce.

  120. 120
    avatar GS says:

    Am I the only one who found Charlie Brown (the character and the cartoon as well) depressing. I never saw the humour in a that spoilt little tw@t Lucy pulling the American Football away.

  121. 121
  122. 122
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 28, 2013 at 6:54 pm

    “The accounts really don’t mean that much to anybody except Ashley, right?”

    Wrong GS. He’s turned many of the fans into borderline obsessives about the club’s finances with this nauseating Messiah narrative of his, the one where he’s convinced many fans that he’s saved the club from certain financial oblivion and we must celebrate his presence at the club every time he makes a fat profit.

    Then again, maybe it’s just Ed Harrison’s blogs that are getting to me in a “pass the sickbag” kind of way.

    Yes Chuck, Muhammad. Very clever.

  123. 123
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 28, 2013 at 7:13 pm

    “Am I the only one who found Charlie Brown (the character and the cartoon as well) depressing.”

    I’ve never bothered with the little c**t GS, I’m English.

  124. 124
    avatar GS says:

    Worky @122: I disagree about Ashley. I think he wants success for NUFC even if it is just to make himself richer. I think he veers from wanting to be a dictator to realising he should probably stick to his own knitting and Sprots Direct.

    As for Mr. Ed. He’s been in the USA, USA, USA too long and is rah rah all of the time. The frcking idiots over here shout “get in the hole” when Tiger Woods is teeing off on a 600 yard par 5.

    Where is the Benfica epic?

  125. 125
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: now this says something about the mess, collusion, conspiracy of the dunces. Isn’t Toney Blare an ambassador or something now?

    http://blogs.marketwatch.com/thetell/2013/03/27/madoff-points-finger-at-the-banks/

  126. 126
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 28, 2013 at 8:07 pm

    “Isn’t Toney Blare an ambassador or something now?”

    He’s still bringing peace to the Middle East, GS. You couldn’t make it up.

  127. 127
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 28, 2013 at 8:07 pm

    “Isn’t Toney Blare”

    Whu are you spelling like Chuck, GS?

  128. 128
    avatar GS says:

    I was misspelling on purpose to emphasise my dislike of him . I think he is a self righteous prick who BLARES and bleats. He says things that sound plausible but are not true. He is a conman. I think he is being paid a lot of money for that cushy gig he has in the middle east, he’s probably brokering a few arms deals as well.

  129. 129
    avatar GS says:

    Who the hell converts to Catholicism? The father, the son and the Holy Ghost? They invented the Holy Ghost in the 3rd century so where was he before that?

    So this most learned of men, Tony, decides he wants to opt in to that ridiculousness?

    Maybe he wants to be Pope someday. I wouldn’t put it past him.

  130. 130
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 29, 2013 at 6:31 am

    “I was misspelling on purpose to emphasise my dislike of him .”

    Oh, I just thought you were spelling it like Chuck would, GS.

    GS says:
    March 29, 2013 at 6:39 am

    “Who the hell converts to Catholicism?”

    Who the hell wants to read Alan Pardew on depression?

    http://www.nufcblog.com/2013/03/29/alan-pardew-talks-about-depression/

    “We – and particularly myself – had to help him through that stage. It was difficult for him.”

    What a self serving knob. Does he want a medal?

  131. 131
    avatar GS says:

    This man calls himself a journalist?!

    http://www.blogonthetyne.co.uk/2013/03/hatem-ben-arfa-is-worth-the-pe.html

    Instead of a puff piece he should be asking what the h*ll the NUFC medical staff are doing and why was he risked on a plastic pitch? Now Ben Arfa doesn’t need hamstring surgery?

  132. 132
    avatar GS says:

    Worky @130: I am guessing that Cabaye didn’t need any medication or therapy since he was mainly treated by Dr. Pardew.

    Depression is a clinical term, it is not just being a little bit fatigued and sad. Maybe he did get professional help. Pardew brings up Gary Speed, so you would think they took it seriously. Hopefully the same medical professionals that were treating Hatem Ben Arfa weren’t involved.

  133. 133
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, I know all about depression, that’s why I don’t need a lecture on it from Dr. Pardew. It was incredibly crass to bring in Gary Speed hanging himself as if the two things are related.

    You can tell that Ryder (and the Chronic) assumes that his readers are idiots. Every single sentence is a paragraph because he assumes they are so thick they don’t have the attention span to read a paragraph of several sentences from start to finish.

    Actually, on second thoughts, he’s probably right.

  134. 134
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    there’s no way cabaye would be up for playing football, if he had the dreaded affliction.
    i know all about it, i’ve suffered with it for years.
    i would say cabaye was probably suffering from mental exhaustion and burn out, rather than depression.
    pardew wants to f**k right off, i’m sick and tired of that blokes patter.

  135. 135
    avatar workyticket says:

    joe hawkins says:
    March 29, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    “pardew wants to f**k right off, i’m sick and tired of that blokes patter.”

    You’ve got it as bad as I have by the look of things Joe. The grey gadgie just seems to get me radged whenever he opens his cakehole. I can’t help it.

  136. 136
    avatar GS says:

    Joe Hawkins: I could be totally wrong and Cabaye could have had a serious issue, but I doubt it. The way he and Pardew were describing it like it was a result of not having his summer hols and winter break pretty much tell you it wasn’t that serious. Now Pardew is taking credit.

    The stack of self help books and “power phrases” would have come in useful for once.

    I also doubt that Dr. Pardew understands what depression is because he is so far up his own ars* he wouldn’t see it. How doesn’t he know that when he opens his mouth, sh*t comes out? He has this misplaced confidence in himself. He is a middle manager in all senses of the word and that is all he will ever be (if we win the Europa Cup I will totally change my tune though :) )

  137. 137
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, you’ll be happy to know that the first part of my two part Benfica epic is up now. You were asking about it.

  138. 138
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    worky, it’s when you cannot even motivate yourself to even wash your face, and sometimes cannot get out of bed, then you have all manner of cnuts, telling you to pull yourself together, when they haven’t got a clue, what your going through.
    unless you’ve had it, and been through it, no one knows how bad it is.
    everyone you know becomes an amateur shrink, and think they know best.
    if there is one good thing that comes out of it, is you know who your friends are, or who are not worth a light, and not worth bothering with.
    when it comes to these kind of illnesses, there is still a stigma attached to it, and some people i thought i knew, look at you as if your something resembling michael myers or jason voorhees.

  139. 139
    avatar chuck says:

    C’mon , even I got the “Blare”
    You know i have noticed that about you, just dont appear to get the subtleties of many statements, unless they are made obvious.
    Which could be the result of a pedigogical mindset, that concentrates only on the language presented.
    Which clarifies why you have (as admitted) a problem understanding Wittgenstein.

  140. 140
    avatar chuck says:

    A classic example of social issolation, which eventually leads to depression and worse things.
    Both of you have to get out more, thats all!

  141. 141
    avatar chuck says:

    Kidding folks !
    And i do know the stigma and seriousness of depression.
    I dont want to sound like some amature shrink, but there’s a lot to be said for therapy within support groups.
    And to remain issolated and attempt to deal with depression, is not an answer.

  142. 142
    avatar GS says:

    Newcastle club policy is very strange to me. They let Ben Arfa go back to France and Coloccini to Argentina to recover from injuries. You would think you would want the NUFC medical staff to monitor their progress. Well maybe not :) Then they don’t offer Danny Simpson a new contract. If you’re purple you’re golden, if you aren’t a purple you don’t matter.

  143. 143
    avatar GS says:

    Lee, take your lips away from that man’s c*ck. Was it so long ago that you don’t remember Brighton in the FA Cup?

    http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/lee-ryder-time-stop-remember-2206816

  144. 144
    avatar workyticket says:

    “Lee Ryder on how far Newcastle United have come under Mike Ashley”

    Ryder’s the one who’s coming under Mike Ashley judging by that piece of oleaginous gush, and all the other shite he’s written.

  145. 145
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: it is unbelievable that Wor Lee can write that and not see that it might be compared to later losses in the FA Cup. One recent one that seemingly inspired Ashley to sign a load of Frenchies because he realized we were in trouble.

    He is the senior writer at the main NUFC paper. It is his job and probably his passion, but he is still so bad at it that he writes stuff like @143.

  146. 146
    avatar GS says:

    Oleaginous? I had to look it up. Sometimes I don’t know the meanings of words but it is not often that I see one I have never heard before.

  147. 147
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, Lee Ryder’s oleaginous in both senses of the word, ie he’s obsequious AND he’s fatty!

  148. 148
    avatar GS says:

    Dr. Pardew now says it wasn’t depression. I hate to say it but he is probably right to pander to these players and let them go to their homelands when they are injured. They have been pampered their whole lives and probably expect it now. I just couldn’t see Brian Clough doing it.

    http://www.touchlinetalk.com/newcastle-taking-stars-problem-very-seriously/41219/

  149. 149
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS says:
    March 29, 2013 at 9:16 pm

    “I just couldn’t see Brian Clough doing it.”

    “I don’t need a boring book by Freud to show me how to [read people]. I’ve been doing it since day one in management. I can tell, from the moment I see someone in the dressing room, whether he’s off colour, had a row with his missus, kicked the cat or just doesn’t fancy it that particular day. I know who needs to have his arse kicked. I know who needs leaving alone to get on with it… It’s a special kind of coaching done only by very, very good managers – like me. The art of management is knowing your own players, and I’m not talking about whether someone has a better right foot than left. I’m talking about really knowing them, knowing what sort of person you’ve got on your hands…and I don’t remember Freud winning a European Cup final.” – Big mouth himself.

    BTW, I’ve found that the best cure for depression is listening to John Shuttleworth. It’s much harder to feel depressed when you’re listening to Sheffield’s most versatile singer-songwriter.

    “Austin Ambassador Y-Reg.”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imDvCCy9PMg

    “Betty Turpin”

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