No sell on bonus for Toon if Carroll completes West Ham move

Andy Carroll.

No Carroll windfall for Toon.

I thought that this one was done a long time ago.

However, rumours have (re)surfaced that despite receiving an absurd fee of £35 million for Andy Carroll when he was sold to Liverpool in January 2011, Newcastle United would still be due to receive 25% of the agreed £15 million fee if he completes a move to West Ham.

This is not true.

The truth is that Newcastle United will only receive a sell on bonus in the highly unlikely event that Liverpool sold him on a higher sum than the ridiculous £35 million they paid for the player. Of course, there is more chance of hell freezing over than this happening, especially now that Liverpool finally seem to be on the verge of putting the Carroll saga behind them.

There was also no substantiation whatsoever for the media stories that Andy Carroll has been “stalling” on the West Ham move in the vain hope that he could make a glorious return to St James’ Park either.


avatar NUFCBlog Author: workyticket workyticket has written 1052 articles on this blog.

Related Posts:

Go to comment box

92 Responses to “No sell on bonus for Toon if Carroll completes West Ham move”

  1. 1
    avatar Danno says:

    Carroll wouldn’t want to go to a team fighting relegation each season,would he ? And with Cashley only buying use French chumps for less than £5 million,it’s relegation next season and beyond SUCKERS ;-) The man with the 8 year contract ( Who is a degenerate gambler ) Is taking use back to the championship ;-) FOOLS

  2. 2
    avatar slick says:

    Danno your a kn*b.

  3. 3
    avatar Bill says:

    We at Liverpool where the fools for paying such a stupid amount for a donkey.

  4. 4
    avatar tunyc says:

    FFS, 35M wasn’t enough for some folks?

  5. 5
    avatar Paul in Hollywood says:

    Shucks… we really blew that deal!

  6. 6
    avatar tunyc says:

    Not a donkey but, indeed, never a 35M player. Then again, Torres wasn’t worth 50M so there you go.

  7. 7
    avatar Subz00 says:

    book off danno!!!

  8. 8
    avatar Danno says:

    Where did use end up this season ( Oh yeah 16th & lucky not to be relegated ) Your French players only care about fighting each other,than bothering to fight for the club ;-) lmfao
    I think Cashley and degenerate Gambler Pardew are a great pair to take use to where use belong ( IN THE CHAMPIONSHIP SUCKERS ) By the way,since use got £35 million for Carroll,how much of that money has Cashley spent ( NOT MUCH JUDGING BY YOUR RELEGATION THREATENED SIDE )

  9. 9
    avatar tunyc says:

    Danno-I’m fascinated to know which non-relegation-threatened side you support where you give a shit about NUFC but still feel so smug. Can’t be the mackems so frankly, I’m lost.

  10. 10
    avatar karl says:

    newcastle are shite

  11. 11
    avatar Cabaye's the day says:

    Danni you really need to bone up on your spelling, stop using use, it’s you. I suppose that’s what happens when you buck your sister!

  12. 12
    avatar nzedtoonman says:

    Bit personal CTD however Danno you should realise that half-breeds like yourself who suffer from severe illiteracy , and personal hygiene issues, are automatically diverted by default to the Black Caps Blog site , where they all talk about who’s cousin is currently on the menu…

    Anyway back to the blog..

    This Garcia / Woods thing , can anyone tell me was it the spanish crowds in the Euro Champs League , who were classed as racist for certain chants !

  13. 13
    avatar Milner says:

    Danno, use gayboy.

  14. 14
    avatar Milner says:

    Are our league objectives are to hit a top 5/6 spot next season? Given how much the Europa can damage, and the need for a huge squad – and thus for us, quite a few transfers this summer and next would be needed….so,

    Should the Toon direction next season, just be to try and win a Cup, league or FA?

    What’s the best way for us to win the FA Cup?

  15. 15
    avatar nzedtoonman says:

    Apart from this episode below against Asssley Cole,’t-dismiss-alves-racism‎Cached

    They were also fined along with Russia 40,000 pounds for racism in Euros 2012 !

    See spain has a problemo , and garcia is just expounding his national heritage which is basic racial abuse to black persons !

    He would have been better serving him Ho’s than KFC methinks !

  16. 16
    avatar nzedtoonman says:

    Er sorry milner mate, but after our dismal show in FA Cup , don’t think that silver is on pardoo’s radar !

    They only look at 40 points , January appears and FA Cup footy, and they look at what is the least damage the match will cost to their premier league campaign !

    Eventually I think the FA cup will go thye way of the league cup …second rate to the EPL ,

    The big teams will concentrate on Top 4 and Champs league where the money is …the other teams aspire to get to where the Top4 are with limited success…

    Next year Spurs are in the Europa League, watch them struggle to reach top 8 if they go far in Europe eh ?

  17. 17
    avatar GS says:

    Milner: if we win a cup we would get into Europe. Looks like 7-8th is what we will be shooting for since Liverpool is the benchmark.

    In terms of money and global appeal there really is a top 6 (which includes Liverpool). I see it here in Chicago Pubs where they have many more fans. Then there is Everton and us, which means if we punch our weight we should be 7th or 8th.

  18. 18
    avatar Gambler says:

    How are Newcastle going to get to 8th next season?? Just avoided relegation, purchased a lot of dead wood that won’t be leaving soon and Ashley’s tight pockets.

    I don’t dislike Newcastle but I think Pardew seems clueless and you need to change him if you want a challenge higher than finishing above the black cats next season.

    Feel free to abuse me lol but I am interested to know if you would switch Pardew out right now if you had the choice and who you would want (Martinez, Poyet, O’Niell lol etc)?

  19. 19
    avatar workyticket says:

    Gambler says:
    May 23, 2013 at 7:35 am

    “Just avoided relegation, purchased a lot of dead wood that won’t be leaving soon and Ashley’s tight pockets.

    I don’t dislike Newcastle but I think Pardew seems clueless and you need to change him if you want a challenge higher than finishing above the black cats next season.”

    No, the players we bought are very good, Gambler, it’s just Pardew being a poor manager and he always was, even when he was fifth. As I pointed out in a piece a long time ago, lots of managers in the past have had good seasons, won manager of the year and then dropped like a stone into obscurity. Pardew is one of those managers. Personally, I wanted Michael Laudrup when he went to Swansea. Now though, I would take Big Ron Atkinson over the current incumbent!

  20. 20
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    Gambler, your bang on, He’s fooken useless!
    The fans should have seen this after the first carry on, With Carroll, And The Magic Helicopter ride, In terms of he has no power, No say, And not to mention an abject failure, As a manager.
    When ever i hear that stupid b*****d trying to talk tough, You have to have a giggle.
    It surprises me that there is anyone left to listen to his empty talk.

  21. 21
    avatar workyticket says:

    Has anyone being having problems with this site over the past few days?

  22. 22
    avatar tunyc says:

    Not me, worky. Well, other than some of the comments above…

  23. 23
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    I would even have someone like Gary Johnson, Over that prat Pardew!

  24. 24
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    Worky, nee bother for me, Either!

  25. 25
    avatar sirjasontoon says:

    Nope all cool Worky.
    Was shite on my phone the other night though :lol:

  26. 26
    avatar workyticket says:

    Best headline on Pardew being told he won’t be sacked:

    “It’s Carry on Pardew” in the Mackem Echo.

    Sums it up rather well really.

    Keep those reports coming in!

  27. 27
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    “However, It seems Ashley, Pardew and managing director Derek Llambias have plotted a way forward for the club”
    You have got to be joking!, These three couldn’t organize their crap into the pan, Without someone doing it for them.
    I don’t know what’s worse, Them keeping him on, Of their own volition, Or him convincing them he is the man to take them forward.
    The whole lot of them need to go, A.S.A.P, They have no idea how to run a Football club, Or how to treat their fan base.
    The fans have shown nothing but loyalty, And are given nothing in return, but a sub standard product.
    They are the life blood of the club, And Ashley and Co, Continue to abuse them.
    I keep saying it, But, “But The Worm Will Turn”, And they will not always put up with it.
    Once total apathy sets in, The crowds will go down, And the fool will end up with nothing, For his investment.

    That grey heed cnut, Will be off sunning himself now, And leaving everything up in the air, While the fans are left with nothing but despair!

  28. 28
    avatar GS says:

    I am sick of Pardew, but are there any positives for the coming season that may see us upper midtable?

    * it couldn’t get much worse in terms of results and playing style, this may be the low water mark?

    * Cisse could regain the goalscoring touch

    * Hopefully, we will have a new prolific goalscorer to go along with Cisse

    * There will be a full preseason.

    * They will get a new coach, hopefully for the 1st team

    * Pardew will really have learned some lessons as he says he has (I doubt it)

    * Coloccini will decide to stay another year. The money situation makes this more likely than it would appear.

    * we will get a centre back with pace as at least a back-up even if Colocinni stays

    * there is no international tournament so players should be rested and fit (and Cabaye not “depressed”)

    * the new Frenchies will have time to settle and bed in, although if they all scoot back to France for 6 weeks this might be difficult.

    Of course, Pardew will probably continue to play players out of position, make bizarre substitutions and team selections but the above factors MIGHT offset some of his ineptitude. We might do well (better anyway) despite him?

    I am trying to be optimistic as I hoped he would be sacked.

  29. 29
    avatar Paul in Hollywood says:

    I don’t think it’s all a bed or roses for Pardew. I would imagine that if we find ourselves lurking anywhere near the drop zone by Christmas he will have been told that he will be dismissed. He has very little room for excuses at this point.

  30. 30
    avatar tunyc says:

    GS @ 28: I suppose there may be some abstract upside to consider (mostly that even with our abject display this season we still had a chance to finish 11th going into our final match) but as you put it the other day, NUFC under Pardew is in no way entertainment. I’ll always follow the club. I dare say, however, that I’ll spend more of my weekend mornings on more rewarding tasks than watching AP’s horrible brand of negative football like hanging out with my new baby, helping my wife choose new drapes, re-finishing the floor or having teeth pulled until he’s gone…

  31. 31
    avatar GS says:

    tunyc: got a bottle of tequila in the cupboard, but was trying to look on the bright side so I don’t hit it before noon :)

    Anyway, I hope Brendan has second season syndrome. I read a quote from him that said “My biggest mentor is myself because I have had to study, so that’s been my biggest influence”. Didn’t he work under Mourihno?

    He really makes you want to root against him.

  32. 32
    avatar chuck says:

    There’s only one way to get rid of Pardew, boycott games and those that do decide to attend, let Ashley know their feelings.

    It does seem unbelievable that Ashley still believes Pardew is capable of any success.

    Which really explains everything.

    I repeat my mantra…

    Until a GM/Football Director, with a good knowledge of the game, including both the player and money management sides.

    Which also consists of expanding the brand name and increasing profit.

    Of which success on the field has to play a major role.

    The sooner Ashley figures out this is the key, the sooner he can enjoy being the owner.

    Look every successful club in the league, has someone in that role and the better the he is , the more success we will have, with a good GM at the helm, everything else will fall into place.

    Look at the positives, a state of he art stadium, filled for the most part, plus the basis of a good side.

    Sure we don’t have the massive fan base or a big catchment area and if one checks it out, it’s only clubs who have had success that have a large fan base from outside their catchment area.

    Yes ! everything is in place for this club to attain both success and at the same time increase revenue.

    All that’s required is for Ashley to realize he will never make it happen, unless he surrenders control to a professional, who knows how to make it happen.

    The present two idiots, are worse than useless, they are a detriment to the club.

    I really believe that the side it’s self, would do better on the field, if they totally ignored any instructions from Pardew and just went out and played the game as it should be played.

    They are Pro’s FFS.

    More than we can say about “the three stooges” presently holding back this club, who’s their arrogance is only exceeded by their ignorance.

  33. 33
    avatar workyticket says:

    GS, Aye, the David Brent of football bragged about working Mourinho and Scolari in the same quote. Rodgers really is a tosser on an epic scale.

    “My biggest mentor is myself, I’ve always felt. But I’ve just been fortunate enough [on] my journey to come across top British and European managers… Champions League winner [Jose Mourinho] and a World Cup winner [Luiz Felipe Scolari]. But my biggest mentor is myself because I’ve had to study, so that’s been my biggest influence.” Brendan Rogers, 2011.

  34. 34
    avatar chuck says:

    I’m bummed out they haven’t fired this jerk and to think all I have in my future is more boring hoofball, until Ashley finally figures it out, FFS !

  35. 35
    avatar chuck says:

    You know your hero worship stuff, gets a bit old.

    And if you want to talk facts instead of nonsense, about Your hero “The Prince of Denmark” then lets.

    Yes he was a great player, yes he played under some great managers, but he has been managing for some time now and apart from some success in Demark, has won nowt!

    And I know anything regarding Rodgers is for the most part, misdirected my way.

    Actually I don’t really like the guy, on a personal level.

    But I do respect what he has accomplished, at both Swansea and Liverpool.

    Face it he had Swansea playing an attractive style of football, which benefitted Laudrup.

    And this season, managed to accomplished a whole ethos and style change at Liverpool.

    Which took time, but the success showed in the latter half of the season.

    Finishing fifteen points ahead of Swansea and losing only one, in their last ten, not to mention the game against us.

    Where as Swansea came on strong in the early season, but faded in the latter stages, winning just one in their last ten games.

    What i’m saying there’s a difference between both managers, but it appears you view it on a personal level, where as my view it only in regard to results.

  36. 36
    avatar Jimbob says:

    There you go. Expect Pardew to be out of a job by December. If he keeps to his word.

  37. 37
    avatar tunyc says:

    chuck-you’re still wrong about Laudrup. Maybe leagues other than the PL don’t count to you, but a bunch of “reputed” managers like, let’s say, AP or for another example, Martinez-haven’t won anything more prestigious than the Danish league title. Then there’s the three cups in Denmark before he turned 41 years old. And the English League Cup. All with very cheaply assembled squads.

    As of now, I’m refusing to watch any matches live or buy any merchandise at all until this clown is gone. As long as AP is here-there’s no hope.

  38. 38
    avatar GS says:

    Worky: I was reading Football365’s end of season summary and they had 3 “Brendonisms” one of which I thought was funny. I thought I would pass it on. It wasn’t a dig at one of your other contributors. I have given up on him.

  39. 39
    avatar tunyc says:

    Rodgers also has less on his resume than Laudrup. Fact. You know, Laudrup is the PL manager whose managerial CV looks most like SAF’s before he joined United.

  40. 40
    avatar GS says:

    Here you go tunyc, something to get you worked up :) Derek’s latest statement where he basically says it is business as usual:

  41. 41
    avatar tunyc says:

    Yep, nothing to see here, move along.

    Nothing worth seeing indeed.

  42. 42
    avatar GS says:

    Note about the statement, he gives absolutely no specifics. I know they think they are pro poker players and want to keep their cards close to their chest but we deserve to know something of what their plans are after that season.

  43. 43
    avatar workyticket says:

    tunyc says:
    May 23, 2013 at 6:08 pm

    “chuck-you’re still wrong about Laudrup. Maybe leagues other than the PL don’t count to you, but a bunch of “reputed” managers like, let’s say, AP or for another example, Martinez-haven’t won anything more prestigious than the Danish league title.”

    tunyc, Brondby aren’t the biggest club in Denmark by any means, but they were after Laudrup took them over. However, it was actually Laudrup’s year at Getafe where I realised that he had it as a coach as well as a player. They’re a tiny side like Swansea in a big league (La Liga). He took them to the Spanish Cup final and the quarter final of the Europa League where Bayern Munich had to go into extra time to beat them. As with Cruyff, listening to him speak is an education in football.

  44. 44
    avatar Gordielaa says:

    Danno – use? Are you thick?

  45. 45

    No surprise that Pardew keeps his job. I think he’ll be in trouble if we’re struggling at Christmas though.

    But even if Pardew does eventually get the boot, unless there’s some drastic change of approach from Ashley/Llambias, their priority will be to get someone who is cheap and will toe the line rather than someone who might actually be a good manager.

  46. 46
    avatar GS says:

    This San Lorenzo Guy is a total sh*t stirrer:

    They can’t afford any fee and want Coloccini to take a massive pay cut? OK, fine and why don’t you have Hatem Ben Arfa while you are at it :)

  47. 47
    avatar sirjasontoon says:

    Keep the yes man at the helm :lol:
    Never seen such out of touch owners.

  48. 48
    avatar Jimbob says:

    Dunno why so many are upset. We’ve got “affordable football” to keep lookking forward to.

  49. 49
    avatar Jimbob says:

    When or if they sack him, they’ll have the excuse of not being able to get anyone quality in as a replacement as it’ll be mid-season and it’ll be hard getting a top manager “over the line” as they’ll all be employed. So we’ll get a Kinnear type to see us through to the end of the season, after which they’ll get a full time contract offered.

  50. 50
    avatar chuck says:


    I noticed you picked out one small part of Laudrups resume, where he won something, Bronby being a club not unlike Ajax or Porto, where silverware is expected.

    I heard nothing about the EPL, where Rodgers had to reinvent Liverpool’s game, whereas Laudrup had a team that required nothing but a few signings (where he recruited well)but required little change to the style of play.

    The last ten games tells it all.
    Liverpool losing one out of ten,
    Swansea winning one out of ten.
    Lets judge on results not personalities.

  51. 51
    avatar chuck says:

    Worky sez

    “As with Cruyff, listening to him speak (Laudrup) is an education in football.”

    So what happened during Swansea’s last ten games, either he stopped speaking or his side stopped listening.
    FFS Worky give it a rest with Cruyff The Barca of their time and concentrate on present reality.
    You are such a football romantic.

  52. 52
    avatar workyticket says:

    chuck says:
    May 23, 2013 at 8:02 pm

    “I noticed you picked out one small part of Laudrups resume, where he won something, Bronby being a club not unlike Ajax or Porto, where silverware is expected.”

    Chuck, you’re bullshitting again. Brondby have won just one Danish Cup since Laudrup left in 2006.

  53. 53
    avatar workyticket says:

    Jimbob says:
    May 23, 2013 at 7:47 pm

    “So we’ll get a Kinnear type to see us through to the end of the season, after which they’ll get a full time contract offered.”

    Jimbob, have you ever heard of Peter Cook’s archetypal English gaffer whom he created for Private Eye, Neasden FC’s “Tight lipped, ashen faced supremo, Ron Knee (59)”?

  54. 54
    avatar Jimbob says:

    Worky, nope?

  55. 55
    avatar Paul in Hollywood says:

    It’s very simple – Pardew has to come out swinging next season with some positive results. He’s convinced or bluffed Mike Ashley into believing that he is worth a second chance. Until then, we’re stuck with what we have; but I don’t believe for a moment that Pardew has been given carte blanche to take us back to the Championship. It’s up to Pardew at this point to bring success to the club: attractive football, winning results, tough to beat.

  56. 56
    avatar workyticket says:

    Jimbob says:
    May 23, 2013 at 9:03 pm

    “Worky, nope?”

    Actually, I was wrong. The world of Ron Knee and Neasden FC was more the creation Barry Fantoni than Peter Cook. I always think of him when Ashley and Llambias are in the hunt for a manager though. He also reminds me alot of Graham Carr when I look at his less than stellar career as a manager.

  57. 57
    avatar workyticket says:

    Paul in Hollywood says:
    May 23, 2013 at 9:40 pm

    “It’s up to Pardew at this point to bring success to the club: attractive football, winning results, tough to beat.”

    Paul, of course, everyone knows the difference between winning and losing, but the difference between attractive and unattractive football? I really don’t think that Llambias knows the difference, and quite a few of the fans don’t either.

    Do you remember some of them bleating about how they could see that Pardew was bringing a more entertaining “passing” style to Newcastle United? That’s why I had to expose the long ball thing. It was like the Emperors new clothes, both the fans and football idiots like Llambias and Ashley just couldn’t see it even though it was happening right in front of their eyes. They had completely deluded themselves.

  58. 58
    avatar Jimbob says:

    Yes. But now we must stop being ‘fickle’ and ‘get behind the team’ and stop ‘complaining’.

    The “affordable football” winds me up. It’s as if it’s a sly dig. We’ve given you so much, Wonga came in also and re named the ground and painted over that sign like they’re heros. A hate the whole thing.

  59. 59
    avatar workyticket says:

    Jimbob says:
    May 23, 2013 at 10:19 pm

    “Yes. But now we must stop being ‘fickle’ and ‘get behind the team’ and stop ‘complaining’.”

    You’ve read UTD111’s latest diktat to the fans then? :-)

  60. 60
    avatar Jimbob says:

    It’s fantasy land thinking a 52 year old loser of a manager is suddenly going to learn how to set a team up to play properly, that the negativity fed into the players by the manager is going to just disappear and they’ll all be fired up come August. You can see in all of them how fed up they are. No point signing any player with any skill as it’ll be quickly dispelled. Graham Carr’s wasting his time.

  61. 61
    avatar Jimbob says:

    It’s everywhere Worky. Even the statistics, performances, the unwanted records, brand of football etc is just ignored. It’s all physically there but brushed aside. We need “stability”, Sir Alex Ferguson”, “David Moyes”. You won’t achieve stability if you’ve got the wrong man in place. How anyone can defend him confuses me. And there is nothing in the blokes CV that anyone should find comforting. He’s not a young manager, he’s been doing this for 14 years. 14 years of messing things up, and repeating the same mistakes.

    Some fans even think this season was acceptable because we got to the Euro QF. And were only three points off 11th! The bar has well and truly been lowered.

  62. 62
    avatar Jimbob says:

    workyticket says:
    May 23, 2013 at 10:23 pm

    “You’ve read UTD111′s latest diktat to the fans then?”

    No, why? Was he moaning about Chelsea and Tottenham?

  63. 63
    avatar workyticket says:

    Jimbob says:
    May 23, 2013 at 10:37 pm

    “No, why? Was he moaning about Chelsea and Tottenham?”

    “So the speculation can now stop. It’s also time for the criticism to stop.

    “It’s time to let them get on with the rebuilding job needed and for fans to concentrate on supporting the club, the manager and the players.”

    Of course, as his usual with the folk who tell us that any criticism of Pardew is treasonous and “not getting behind the team,” he starts criticising the squad, suggesting “we all know” that it’s some of the players who need improving rather than the the manager.

    “Let’s hope the right signings can be made in the summer transfer window to plug the weaknesses in the squad we all know are there – and also to cover any gaps left by players who may be leaving.”

  64. 64
    avatar workyticket says:

    Anyway, here’s a much better piece on a much better blog:

  65. 65
    avatar Jimbob says:

    I don’t agree with the “time for criticism to stop” part mostly. It’s not up to him or anyone for that matter to decide that. As much as it infuriates me I can’t tell the pro Pardew’s to stop being pro, just as I can’t be asked to stop judging our no-nothing no-it-all manager.

    There’s far worse than that Worky but I get your point. Don’t join the Newcastle United Supporters Page on Facebook. You’ll lose faith in humanity if you read that. The other day there was praise for Wonga, painting that sign and re-naming the ground.

  66. 66
    avatar Jimbob says:

    Top website that. Shame they don’t write as much anymore, but you can’t blame them having watching the season we had.

  67. 67
    avatar workyticket says:

    Jimbob says:
    May 23, 2013 at 11:31 pm

    “Top website that. Shame they don’t write as much anymore”

    It just isn’t worth the effort Jimbob. I’ve found that with Newcastle United, it’s better just to copy and paste someone else’s crap and serve lots of ads.

  68. 68
    avatar workyticket says:

    Shit, we really are a load of grumpy bastards on here.

  69. 69
    avatar GS says:

    I tried to say something positive earlier @28 :)

  70. 70
    avatar workyticket says:

    Breaking news – I’ve thought of something to be positive about for the weekend!

    The bairns are in the Hong Kong Soccer Sevens over this weekend and I’ll try and get some of it on here if I can.

    Alan Pardew isn’t coaching them (Willie Donachie is) and we actually beat a side of young Villans to win the competition last year!

  71. 71
    avatar Grumpy Old-Toon says:

    Just to keep the depression going, what’s the point in getting excited about the Bairns as they will never get first team action and will disappear into football oblivion.

    “Brain the size of a planet, and I had to be a Toon supporter” :(

  72. 72
    avatar DarthBroon says:


    Thinking way ahead here, but will you be doing a Fantasy Football league for next year?

    I wasn’t really into FF the last time there was a league. Missed out there.

  73. 73
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    Was that Llambias at his patronizing best?
    I swear this bloke gives veiled insults behind his statements.
    This crack about, “Affordable Football”, Does that mean us mere peasants, Will have to like it, Or lump it?

    Complete fools the lot of them, And each one as deluded as the next.
    I said the other day, They have no understanding of the club, The fans, The way the club works.
    They have been here for six years, And they are no further forward, And more out of touch with the fans, Than ever before.
    This is down to their own disdain and stupidity, In the handling of the Keegangate Affair!

    I agree with Gary Neville, When he said the Heart and Soul, Of the club was being ripped out.
    They are trying to phase out the hard edged Partisan support, Because they don’t want to take the abuse, Of the problems, They themselves, Have created.
    They are meddling with all areas of the clubs Identity, History, Traditions etc .
    They are picking away at the threads, Until there is nothing left, And you might as well change the name of the club to, “Sports Direct United”.
    No more was this highlighted this year, With their ridiculous French day, To which some of our more moronic fans, Payed for the privilege, By handing over more money, to the goons, For cheap berets and flags.
    As usual this grubby gesture had all the miscalculations, That we have come to expect from the Lowrachy.
    What was supposed to herald in a new era, Just culminated in another relegation battle.
    The whole thing has become “Two Bob”, And Pardew compounded that fact, In his Prematch interview, Before the Arsenal game.
    When asked about the fans relief of escaping relegation, “Our Fearless Leader” replied, “i hope our fans create a carnival atmosphere, And turn up in fancy dress”.
    That for me, Just sums up the sanitized crap, They are trying to push on the fans.
    As though escaping relegation, Is something to celebrate, For me, You cannot dress up failure, as success.

    Which brings us onto the hapless Pardew, depending on which way you look at it, He has got to be the most, Luckiest or unluckiest, Manager in the Premier league.
    To be rewarded with failure on the one hand, But on the other hand, Having to work with two of the biggest lard heads, In the world, Doesn’t bear thinking about…
    I think they will rue their decision to give him their backing.
    the one constant with Pardew, Is the fact he is consistently bad.
    Even when we finished fifth, We were poor, And found tactically wanting.
    We were played off the park at times, But rode our luck, And got results, From moments of individual brilliance, From Ben Arfa, Cabaye, Raylor, Ba and Cisse.
    There were also a few hidings in there as well, A portent of things to come?
    Well by some this seasons results, Yes, It was without doubt, In the post.
    I have read a few other blogs, And some of the comments on Sky Sports, About Pardew.
    The Pro Pardew Brigade are quick to point out, Stability, He was good enough to get us to fifth, So he he to be a decent manager!
    Two words to that, “GEORGE BURLEY”, just because you win, “The Manager Of The Year”, Doesn’t catapult you to Fergie Status.
    Ashley and Llambias can get reinforcements until the cows come home, Pardew will still play his favourites, And play people out of position, And hoof it down the field, In the hope of picking up second balls.
    This is the man in all his wisdom, Wouldn’t play Tevez or mascherano, In favour of Carlton Cole!
    He can say things like, “we’ll be better next year”, But he isn’t going to change the habits of a life time, And will continue to try and wing it.
    It is going to be another season of struggle, Until the penny finally drops, And they have no other recourse, But to get rid off him!

  74. 74
    avatar workyticket says:

    DarthBroon says:
    May 24, 2013 at 1:11 pm


    Thinking way ahead here, but will you be doing a Fantasy Football league for next year?”

    That was Hugh’s department, Darth.

  75. 75
    avatar workyticket says:

    Joe, just hang on for the Wonga matchday experience, not to mention their outreach work with the Geordie poor through the Newcastle United foundation and also the Wonga fan’s forum, where fans can have a voice. That will certainly change your cynical and jaded views.

  76. 76
    avatar GS says:

    Do we have any preseason games set up? I bet we play Rangers.

  77. 77
    avatar workyticket says:

    Grumpy Old-Toon says:
    May 24, 2013 at 11:59 am

    “Just to keep the depression going…”

    Grumpy, you were having a go at us for that sort of thing not so long ago. Good to see you’re better and living up to your nickname once again.

  78. 78
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    Worky, I wouldn’t put it past them to have, “Wonga Day”,
    Where a couple of old dears are paraded in the Centre circle, wearing a replica kit, Emblazoned with the Logo, Across it.
    They have even designed the kit, So it fits in with the Wonga theme!, Absolutely Scandalous IMO!
    That just highlights what i said above, They are even messing with the clubs kit, To put their Corporate Message across.

  79. 79
    avatar Nutmag says:

    Ive got something positive to say.Since it was confirmed that we were keeping Pardew Ive become so uninterested that I’m spending more time getting work done.Looks like I’m in for a very productive summer Thank you Mr Ashley.

  80. 80
    avatar Paul in Hollywood says:

    Joe @ 73, I hear your plea, your plight and your passion and it is all valiant. However, as it is said in the North, “what can’t be helped must be endured.” I think all we can hope for at this stage is the faintest of smug smiles when we are able to say to the club Lowrachy in the middle of next season “I told you so” after Pardew has failed yet again. The spotlight is firmly on the three of them. Stand and deliver, but few of us will get our hopes up.

  81. 81
    avatar Phisix says:

    I want the new season to start already. But first the long wait for officially signed players. :(

  82. 82
    avatar tunyc says:

    chuck @ 50: silverware is expected at Liverpool too. How’s that gone for Dalglish and Rodgers? Now one of those two is a dinosaur completely past it in the modern game while the other is highly esteemed. It’s almost like the amount of silverware a manager has won doesn’t necessarily indicate their quality. But again, with five cups on his resume before age 50, Laudrup has that covered anyway. I get that you don’t agree with worky’s take on him but ffs, let it go. If you start writing regular blogs you can rattle on about Martinez if you like…

    Paul @ 55: I wish I had your confidence but I feel much more like jimbob @ 60. Pardew is now a cancer at this club and it’s metastasizing. I’m afraid without aggressive action to remove the tumor it may be too late for the patient in 6 months.

  83. 83
    avatar tunyc says:

    jimbob @ 65: yeah, amazing how cowards and pussies always seem to think it’s up to them when criticism of themselves ends. Erm, no-obviously that’s not how it works. AP wins us a treble next season or even just a league cup and an upper-midtable finish, THEN I’ll stop criticizing. Don’t hold your breath.

  84. 84
    avatar joe hawkins says:

    Tunyc, The only triple Pardew will deliver will be, Early exit from the League cup, Early exit from the F.A. Cup, And a relegation battle, In the Premiership, What a triple we have to look forward to!

  85. 85
    avatar tunyc says:

    “There were also a few hidings in there as well, A portent of things to come?”

    joe-that our GD was so much worse than anyone near us in the table that season certainly stuck out to the tiny, tiny statistical analysis part of my mind…portents of things to come indeed.

    “Affordable football”? Wow. So these guys have no self-respect either. That’s dismal even for corporate sloganeering.

  86. 86
    avatar tunyc says:

    I hear you, joe. I can’t watch what the club’s about to go through. Like nutmag, I’m going to have a productive summer around the house…at least the wife will be happy!

  87. 87
    avatar workyticket says:

    tunyc says:
    May 24, 2013 at 3:41 pm

    “chuck @ 50: silverware is expected at Liverpool too.”

    tunyc, Chuck was wrong about Brondby anyway, he just makes things up. As I mentioned earlier, they have only won one Danish Cup since Laudrup left.

  88. 88
    avatar workyticket says:

    tunyc says:
    May 24, 2013 at 3:55 pm

    “Affordable football”? Wow. So these guys have no self-respect either. That’s dismal even for corporate sloganeering.”

    That’s one of Llambias’s big keyphrases, tunyc. He sees Geordie fans as customers of Sports Direct and Wonga, ie dirt poor unemployed people and minimum wage slaves who care about price above everything. He even tried to justify the stadium name change on the grounds that it was creating “affordable football” for the Geordie fans, even though Sports Direct didn’t pay for it (and neither have Wonga, incidentally). He’ll probably use it again next time he opens his trap too.

  89. 89
    avatar AndyMac says:

    Joe Hawkins says: “I agree with Gary Neville, When he said the Heart and Soul, Of the club was being ripped out.
    They are trying to phase out the hard edged Partisan support, Because they don’t want to take the abuse, Of the problems, They themselves, Have created.
    They are meddling with all areas of the clubs Identity, History, Traditions etc . They are picking away at the threads, Until there is nothing left, And you might as well change the name of the club to, “Sports Direct United”

    Agree wholeheartedly with Joe, your comments deserve some recognition. IMO we’re not too far away from the new era of Sports teams who play under their owners franchise names. Red Bull, Coca Cola, Durex (that’s us btw cos we’re always up for a good shagging)

  90. 90
    avatar tunyc says:

    “dirt poor unemployed people and minimum wage slaves who care about price above everything”.

    Ah. The wal mart shopper demographic. Sad thing, he may be onto something there.


  91. 91
    avatar tunyc says:

    But still…it sits so funny juxtaposed with the adage that pro sports is part of the “entertainment” industry. Anyone ever seen a film marketed as “affordable”? Me neither.

  92. 92
    avatar Paul in Hollywood says:

    “Affordable football” is Ashley’s equivalent of “bargain basement”, basement meaning crap football at the bottom end of the Premiership.

    Still, Joe, your understanding of our Treble at least gives us a chuckle!

Leave a Reply

Top of page