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Archive for category: Kevin Nolan.

Newcastle United vs West Ham match banter!

November 11th, 2012 | 76 Comments |

Newcastle United v West Ham United.
The return of big Sam, big Andy and Kevin Nolan.
Venue: St James’ Park, Newcastle.
Date: Sunday, 11th November.
Kick off: 3:00pm
Referee: Mike Dean (the Wirral)‎.
UK TV: None.

Good afternoon and welcome to our “match banter” feature for this afternoon’s game against West Ham.

Today, around 50,000 Geordies and a few Londoners will gather to watch Big Sam’s long balls and Alan Pardew’s long balls clash. As I mentioned in my previous match preview for the game, Newcastle United and West Ham are two of the biggest “route one” teams in the Premiership, so expect to see quite alot of “mortar fire” into both teams’ penalty areas this afternoon, and possibly a fairly tight contest between the ninth and tenth placed teams in the Premiership, as though Big Sam’s teams may not be they most entertaining to watch, they are usually tough nuts to crack.

Of course, today’s game will see the return of no less than three ex-Magpies, Big Sam, Kevin Nolan and Andy Carroll, so let’s hope that they all get a real Geordie welcome! (more…)


Battle of the long balls! Newcastle United vs West Ham match preview

November 11th, 2012 | 10 Comments |

Route one football!
Big Sam's tactics board, or Alan Pardew's?
Venue: St James’ Park, Newcastle.
Date: Sunday, 11th November.
Kick off: 3:00pm
Referee: Mike Dean (the Wirral)‎.
UK TV: None.

In case you are one of those who have successfully deceived yourselves that our manager’s real name is Alan Pardiola, and today’s fixture will be a match between a cultured, elegant passing side of fancy foreigners against big, “long ball” Sam, well think again!

As we go into this game Newcastle and West Ham are currently the two biggest “route one” sides in the Premiership. Looking at my OPTA stats, which defines long balls as passes of over 25 yards, Newcastle United and West Ham are the two biggest long ball merchants, with 17.5% of Newcastle’s total passes being long balls, and 17.9% of West Ham’s.

To put this into some kind of perspective, the percentage for Swansea City (our next opponents incidentally) is 9.7%, which is even bigger gulf than it sounds. Of course, this is not to say that the lower the percentage, the better it is or any nonsense like that. As the great Mackem Buddha of football, Bob Paisley, once said (and also Michael Laudrup more recently), “it’s not about the short pass or the long pass. It’s about the RIGHT pass.” Though the great Dane could say that as he could pass a ball 30 yards on to a team mates foot (and from a tight space too) effortlessly! (more…)


Kevin Nolan – A great loss to Newcastle United?

November 10th, 2012 | 36 Comments |

Kevin Nolan - Chicken dance.
Nolan: Still Chicken dancing on a regular basis.
Of course, Newcastle United’s game against West Ham on Sunday will see the return to St James’ Park of two ex Magpies, Kevin Nolan and Andy Carroll, and also an ex manager, Sam Allardyce.

In this piece I intend to concentrate on one of those, Kevin Nolan, who has received much undeserved flak from the less “gifted” sections of Newcastle United’s fanbase since his departure. Though Carroll has almost certainly received even more, that is undoubtedly a whole story on it’s own and as a Newcastle United blogger, I am still suffering from Carroll fatigue, and possibly you are too?

Getting back to Nolan though, below is one example of the kind of thing I’m writing about from so called “fans”. It is from the commments section below a story on the midfielder in local rag, the Chronic.

“Yes kevin Nolan, one word springs to mind that actually rhyms with “Fishbowl” when talking about the south….”**ithole” Thank you for your service, but sorry, you wouldn’t get into this squad ahead of Ben Arfa or Cabaye, get your head out of the smogg air son, big clubs have demanding, passionate fans, that’s why so many can’t handle the pressure up here and depart for debt laden clubs willing to overpay on salaries, smaller crowds, less expectation, and poorer playing standards installed by useless fat Sam!” (more…)


Pardew’s double-edged “praise” for Hughton in patronising lecture to fans…

September 23rd, 2012 | 15 Comments |

Alan Pardew and Chris Hughton.
Pardew: Damning Hughton with faint praise?
With today’s game against Norwich City seeing Alan Pardew’s predecessor, Chris Hughton, returning to St James’ Park for the first time since his sacking in December 2010, there has been far more of the usual pre match words from the managers on both sides.

On the Pardew side, amongst other things, he has been anxious to remind we fans that we shouldn’t get too carried away with any kind of appreciation for the man who returned us to the Premiership, not to mention bringing former Tottenham colleague, Graham Carr, to the club as his Chief Scout in the February preceding his sacking.

As with much of what Pardew says, there was a whiff of some kind of underlying agenda in his comments. In some double-edged words of “praise,” he sought to diminish Hughton’s contribution to the club as he not so subtly reminded fans of previous smear stories which circulated about Hughton, saying that much of the credit for leading the club back to the Premiership should actually go to Joey Barton, Alan Smith, Steve Harper and Kevin Nolan as it was they who were really running the first team after Hughton’s appointment. (more…)


Newcastle United Vs Aston Villa Match Preview

August 31st, 2012 | 135 Comments |

Old Aston Villa fan.
Villa sign a younger replacement for Shay Given?
Venue: St James’ Park, Newcastle.
Date: Sunday 2nd September,2012.
Kick-Off: 4:00pm.
Referee: Lee Probert.
UK TV: None.

Sunday brings Premier League football back to St James’ Park as Aston Villa provide the opponents for a 4pm kick-off. There will be no UK TV broadcast of the fixture so it will be time to scour the internet for links if you’re not attending the match.

Newcastle will look to bounce back from last weeks defeat at Chelsea. While Villa have lost both their Premier League fixtures to date, a 0-1 loss to West Ham, and a 3-1 defeat to Everton last week at Villa Park. Historically Villa have struggled at St James Park, with only one win in the last twelve years. So the omens do look good if you believe records mean something.

Newcastle United Vs Aston Villa History

The way in which the Villans goaded the Magpies back in 2009 when Newcastle were relegated still strikes a nerve with many Toon followers. On Newcastle’s return to the Premier League in 2010 / 2011, Villa provided our first opponents at home, so a chance for some kind of retribution presented itself. Joey Barton, a Kevin Nolan double and an Andy Carroll hat trick helped to inflict a 6-0 mauling for the Magpies. Last season, Papiss Cissé introduced himself in style, controlling Jonas‘ left wing cross and lashing a volley past ex-Magpie Shay Given to secure a 2-1 victory. The last time we lost to Villa at St James’ Park was during the 2004 /  2005 season, where we witnessed Lee Bowyer and Kieron Dyer fall out very publically and get themselves sent off for fighting after Bowyer felt that Dyer was refusing to pass the ball to him in the game. (more…)