Is a Biblical rinse underway at Newcastle United?
Posted on June 18th, 2011 | 72 Comments |
Is Newcastle United embarking upon a ‘new era’? This humble blogger thinks so and attempts to quantify some of the changes that mark this new era.
Remember when God supposedly gave us all a rinse, rebooting mankind with Noah and what must have been an exceedingly large ark? I get the impression that a similar process is underway at Newcastle United at the moment. A kind of ‘out with the old and in with the new’ situation. It seems like the Good Lord Ashley and Archangel Llambias are doing some smiting and rebuilding the club in their own image (and didn’t Ashley smite Pestilence when he got rid of Dennis Wise?).
The obvious smiting begins with Nolan’s move to West Ham, Barton’s disappearing contract, the possible departure of players like Enrique, Jonas and Best (and, yes, I admit it’s only speculated that they’ll go at the moment), all seemingly replaced by an influx of Frenchmen. The wisdom of tearing out the crux of the team that got us promoted and established us once again as a Premier League side remains to be seen. The proof of the pudding is in the eating as they say (or in just being edible if it’s one of my wife’s puddings) and we’ll know over the next season or two whether Ashley’s gamble has paid off.
However, I think there are more fundamental changes afoot too, which some people might find controversial and others will certainly outright disagree with. What I’m talking about is Mike Ashley’s commitment to the club. I believe he has committed to Newcastle United for the longer term and is now prepared to make a good fist of running things rather than simply selling up as soon as it’s financially viable for him to do so.
Note that I’m not passing judgement as to whether or not I think it’s a good thing that Ashley may be here for the longer term – at least not yet – I’m merely stating that that’s how I read the situation by the way things are going. I could be being hoodwinked by Ashley of course, in which case I’ll look a bigger ass than normal, but I am of the opinion that it is no longer Mike Ashley’s priority to get shot of Newcastle United.
I’m sure the thought of that will raise horror akin to a jalapeño enema in some people, whereas others will no doubt be pleased.
Which brings me on to number twos and thus – with that rather appropriate phraseology – to Derek Llambias. If I had to pick one gigantic testicle amongst all the bollocks that Mike Ashley has dropped during his tenure at our club, it would be that he didn’t appoint a football-savvy chairman. Now, I know from first-hand experience that all the stuff gurus say about successful business being 10% inspiration 90% perspiration is basically guff because it’s at least 50% luck. However, Mike Ashley has billions and I’m inclined to admit he might know a thing or two about businesses that goes beyond luck. He has however confessed that he doesn’t (or at least didn’t) have a clue how to run a football club and I reckon if he had appointed a chairman who did then he would have avoided a lot of problems.
As far as I can see, the contribution Llambias makes to Newcastle is smaller than a pair of stripper’s knickers and I’d be pleased if any ‘new era’ in the club didn’t include him. It seems to me he’s just a clone of Ashley with broadly the same skill-set who would be better off elsewhere. The Amazon perhaps.
Then of course we come to the manager, where perhaps we are to presume that part of the ‘new era’ has already happened when Pardew replaced Hughton. I’m not ready to judge Pardew yet. I thought the summer would be an important time in that respect but it seems to me he has little influence on the transfer process. I could be wrong of course but I’m just reading things as I see them. Pardew may well have been saying Carroll wasn’t for sale to build up his price; he may have ‘promised’ to make the renewing of Nolan’s and Barton’s ‘a priority’ as some sort of planned misdirection; it may just be that the situation changed between him saying one thing and another. But I don’t believe that – I think he was simply out of the loop.
Thusly I think Ashley has made Pardew look a bit of a berk and Pardew himself can’t really be judged on the transfers we make this summer. He will instead have to be judged on what happens on the pitch, which means giving him some time next season. As an aside, although I’m not known for my precognitive abilities (in fact my post-cognitive ones are bad enough), I’d have a little side bet that Pardew won’t last another 18 months, but we’ll see.
The upshot is that I think great change is afoot at the Toon and I’m caught between whistling “The Times They Are A-Changin’” and “There May Be Trouble Ahead“, although it will certainly be interesting either way. I’ll keep an eye out for rainbows.
What do you think?
Sacre blue Hugh !